Shut Up Hollywood

So it’s not totally Hollywood’s fault. We do buy what they’re selling. But is no one else seeing that the emperor isn't wearing clothes? A couple of years ago I went to the movies with some girlfriends. There we saw the trailer to the movie “No Strings Attached”. A girl in the group said “maybe I should try that”. The reply “That’s a movie”. Sure you can smile and shake your head at this girl, but how many others have tried to make someone fall in love with them by being a friend with benefits?  Yes, it is possible but only in extremely rare exceptions. For the most part, once you’re the booty call, you stay the booty call. I recently read a story of a woman who fooled herself into thinking it was just sex and that she could just walk away, but it ate at her and tore her self-esteem into shreds. A lot of females lie to themselves, thinking it won’t hurt them, but it’s damaging. Casual sex will end up controlling you in the end and it won’t be for the better.

The entertainment industry doesn't stop there. Guys often fall prey to one scenario and often. The guy in the friend zone that comes out of it when she realizes he’s the one. After all, it happened to Ryan Reynolds’ character in “Just Friends”. There a huge difference between being friends before dating and being put in the friend zone. The former is when neither were really looking to date each other, it just happened. The latter is when he is very attracted to her and she doesn't really show interest. Yes, she’ll hang out with you, but your name has been moved into a category from which you never get out. You stick around, be her shoulder to cry on, let her talk to you about other guys, etc. etc. etc. None of that will get you out of the zone.

What if you don’t know if you’re in the friend zone? Just ask her out. You’ll get your answer. If you are, move on and don’t waste your time any longer. Don’t take it personal either. Most likely it had nothing to do with looks and everything to do with chemistry/compatibility. Once you let her go you can be open to finding the one who you were supposed to be with.

Both scenarios can happen to either sex. We've all heard of the guy who fell in love while being in a no strings attached relationship. And let’s not forget the girl that was put in the friend zone. Older and wiser people may scoff at this post, but we have a depressed and insecure generation coming up and they’re way more valuable than they think they are.